This article by Dr. Cheri Rainey was originally posted on Forbes.com here.
When I first walk into an organization, I’m often greeted by office walls covered with inspiring mission, vision and values statements. These words shape the stories leaders tell on their websites, in speeches and in job interviews. What continues to surprise me, however, is how often there is a disconnect between what leaders say and what they actually do. In my experience, these five strategies help leaders bring their words to life.
1. Build Culture Daily
Culture is built through behavior, not words on a wall. Real culture is influenced by the decisions leaders make and the actions they take every day. Leaders can spend countless hours refining their vision, mission and values, but if those principles aren’t reflected in daily interactions and decisions, blind spots emerge and trust begins to erode.
Ask yourself:
• What behaviors do I consistently demonstrate daily?
• What behaviors am I willing to tolerate in all team members?
• How do I address behaviors that don’t align with our culture?
A common leadership mistake I see is overvaluing performance at the expense of culture. Leaders regularly hold their star performers to a different standard, allowing them to disrespect others, avoid accountability or engage in behaviors that they would never accept from other employees. Simultaneously, feedback becomes uneven. Low performers receive frequent coaching and correction, while high performers receive very little.
It’s ironic that top performers with high integrity often crave feedback the most. They want to know how they can continue improving, growing and contributing at a higher level. They seek meaningful challenges and opportunities for development. When those opportunities don’t exist, they may leave to find them elsewhere.
2. Rethink Where You Invest Management Energy
Leaders often spend the majority of time managing low performers. However, a leader’s role is not solely to manage performance but to grow and develop other leaders.
Imagine categorizing a high-performing team of stars into three groups: high, middle and low performers. Where will you see the greatest return on investment? Which group offers the most untapped potential for growth in leadership and emotional development?
The answer is often the overlooked “middle” performers.
Top-middle performers may be one opportunity, one mentor or one bit of encouragement away from becoming star performers. Too often, organizations focus on correcting the bottom and rewarding the top, while the middle goes unnoticed. Yet, this group frequently represents the greatest opportunity for growth, as intentional coaching, mentorship and support can elevate both performance and leadership potential.
3. Harness The Power of Peer Mentorship
Leaders develop a culture of trust by showing that they value employees themselves—who they are, who they can become—even more than performance. It’s important to cultivate mentorship within our teams. Match star performers, in each group, with low, middle and high performers they can mentor and help develop.
When looking at potential across the entire team, leaders recognize that each person brings strengths in some areas and opportunities for growth in others. Leaders demonstrate fairness and respect by committing to investing in all people, not just a select few. In the process, they strengthen their leadership and coaching skills by adopting a growth mindset that emphasizes development, rather than simply correcting mistakes.
I work with clients to create organizational and peer “mentor systems,” resulting in a culture of improved employee retention, engagement and continuous learning. I’ve also seen the damage that the lack of peer mentoring can cause.
In a 6000-employee organization, a highly skilled engineer, whose leadership and communication skills did not match the organizational culture or values, was frequently dismissive, curt and unhelpful with direct reports. He consistently reminded employees what they did wrong, instead of offering encouragement and resources. After numerous employee complaints, HR became involved.
His behavior caused significant internal turmoil. People he managed resigned or requested transfers to other departments. However, his leaders didn’t want to lose his expertise. Rather than addressing the underlying leadership issues, they responded by removing all direct reports, retitling him as a subject matter expert and transferring him to another department.
Leaders excused his toxic behaviors because of his talent, sending the message that results mattered more than people, relationships and values.
4. Address Misaligned Behavior Immediately
Our team members pay attention to how we respond to culturally misaligned behaviors.
For example, if anyone, including a star performer, says or does something inappropriate, address it in the moment. Don’t wait. Don’t ignore or postpone the conversation while overthinking the perfect response. Additionally, never embarrass them in front of others.
Respectfully say, “There’s more I want to discuss. Let’s take this offline and review it today.”
To have that follow-up conversation, stay curious and use the 3 C’s coaching tools adapted from Harvard Medical School psychologist Susan David: compassion, curiosity and courage.
Lead with compassion and curiosity: Ask: “Have we really thought this out? Tell me more about what you’re thinking.” Ask questions that help them come to their own conclusions and insights, while intentionally listening to what they are really saying.
Ideally, together you craft a healthy path forward. If not, have the courage to initiate a difficult conversation clearly defining what behavior needs to be changed and by when. Ultimately, people choose their own behaviors.
More often than not, when we spend time connecting with people, using the 3 C’s, a light bulb goes on. They experience “aha” moments, gain new insights and choose to make meaningful changes. True growth is most sustainable when people discover the need and desire for change rather than having it forced upon them.
5. Do Your Own Work First
We all have blind spots. It’s important to do our own work in self-awareness first. When we aren’t aware of our own blind spots, we can be extremely hard on ourselves and others, which hurts us and the people we lead, as well as the culture.
Self-awareness and self-compassion are core qualities of strong, caring leaders. Together, they create the foundation for a culture built on trust, connection and growth.
As AI continues to transform the workplace, more C-suite leaders are focusing on the human side of leadership and asking important questions: “How do we develop empathy? How do we become more agile leaders? How do we deepen our curiosity about what is possible in others, while also becoming kinder to ourselves?”
The answers begin with the inner work of leadership. The culture we create will only ever be as strong as the values we model, the behaviors we demonstrate and the culture we cultivate within ourselves. Before we can inspire growth in others, we must be willing to grow ourselves.
Stay tuned for more insights and tips on leadership development in future blog posts. Until next time, keep leading with purpose and passion!
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Dr. Cheri Rainey is the CEO/Founder of Rainey Leadership Learning, partnering with leaders to support the entire employee life cycle.